Home Mortgage Alliance Corporation (HMAC)

Mastering mindful real estate etiquette

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Published Date 8/29/2024

The term "mindful" is trending on social media, applied to various scenarios from airports to Cirque du Soleil shows. Now, it's making its way into real estate, with experts suggesting that a "demure" approach could boost your chances of securing your dream home.

Realtor.com's Claudine Zip consulted with industry professionals to gather tips on "mindful" real estate shopping. Tricia Watts, owner of Maxnet Homes, emphasizes, "When buying a home, being mindful of etiquette can make the process smoother and more pleasant for everyone involved."

While most homebuyers are familiar with common rules and regulations, such as legal and financial paperwork, there are unwritten etiquette guidelines that can either smooth a sale or potentially derail a deal. Zip spoke with experts who shared advice on how to be a "demure" homebuyer.

Keeping emotions in check is crucial, according to New York-based real estate consultant Jonathan Yarton. He advises, "Try and remain as emotionless as possible when touring homes. Playing it cool will help secure the best deal. It's hard for your realtor to negotiate if the sell-side knows you're incredibly excited!"

Etiquette expert Lisa Mirza Grotts offers additional pointers: "Always arrive on time for viewings and meetings with real estate agents." She also reminds buyers to be respectful of the current occupants' privacy, avoiding touching personal items or using bathrooms without permission.

Agent Alexis Orvari believes that classy decorum drives the demure trend. She suggests dressing politely but not flashy, and keeping conversations with sellers or their agents polite and concise. "Rather than dominating the conversation, listen attentively and ask insightful questions that reflect genuine interest without appearing overly eager," Orvari advises.

Yarton adds, "Be mindful of the property you're visiting. I've had clients run the gamut with how they present and act during showings, but my rule of thumb is always for my clients to act how they'd want others to act in their home."

When it comes to negotiations, real estate broker Jenny Lenz cautions against being overly demure or aggressive. She recommends striking a balance: "Keep your emotions and intentions in check—act demure when it serves your purpose, but don't overplay it. Stay composed, and never give the other side any leverage in negotiations. Being smart, subtle, and strategic will get you much further."

Orvari echoes this sentiment, advising buyers to present offers confidently while being prepared to listen to counteroffers without showing frustration or impatience. "A calm and composed demeanor can often lead to more productive negotiations, as it fosters an environment of mutual respect," she explains.

Zip notes that clear and purposeful communication is key, while Orvari advises, "Be direct in expressing your needs and preferences, but do so in a way that is courteous and considerate. Avoid aggressive language or tactics that could be perceived as pushy."

Finally, don't forget to express gratitude. "After viewing a home or concluding negotiations, a simple thank you note or message to the seller and their agent can go a long way," Orvari concludes. "It shows appreciation and leaves a positive impression, which could be beneficial if multiple offers are on the table."

Realtor, TBWS

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